What do you mean "it's over"?

I got an email from Tina last week saying that bootcamp is over and that we need to come in for our final assessments. I set up a time with her for Wednesday, but, really, I don't wanna. I don't wanna. *stomps feet*

Why? Well, for literally the past month, working out has been the last thing on my mind. I got married; I went on a wonderful honeymoon; I taught class for the past three weeks, five days a week, three hours each day; I'm focused on getting my research back on track; we spent five days in Mr. Kiki's hometown due to a family emergency; we took a long weekend in Toronto to visit family and see a great concert.

We've been in town a total of 13 days out of the past 30.

I'm not looking for excuses. I'm looking to avoid finality. I'm avoiding standing on that scale in front of Tina and seeing that I've gained weight. I know all this. What I'm on is a journey... there are ups and downs, but it never ends. I just feel that this assessment is "final." Can't I keep working out with Tina? Can't I keep going to bootcamp? Can't I take all I've learned and just keep on keeping on? Does it really matter what I weighed in May vs. the third Wednesday in July?

Sigh.